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Throw Away Everything You Know About First Dates

Young couple drinking wine and having fun

What comes to mind when you’re about to go out with your lady friend for the first time?

Maybe a candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant? A romantic stroll down the beach and a picnic paired with her favorite wine?

All of that sounds fine, but NOT on the first date.

To avoid looking desperate, you need to rethink how the first date fits in the big picture. This isn’t the time to bombard her with the romantic stuff; instead, it’s your chance to know each other a little better.

Laying the Groundwork

Remember: proper seduction is all about gradual escalation.

Most women don’t want to feel rushed into something they’re not ready for. So, your first date should go by two simple guidelines:

- Keep it short and sweet; anything over an hour is too much

- Make her feel good around your presence

If you can pull that off, you’ll be able to leave things on a positive note until you see her again.

Plus, you’re not going to create a good first impression by letting the first date drag on and on. Boredom is not a good feeling to have.

With that said, it’s best to plant that seed of attraction early on by coming in prepared.

Ask yourself, “What is she into?”

Chances are you have the same interests (since you liked her enough to ask her out), or she likes something you’re willing to learn more about. Find out what it is and read up on it.

Knowing her type also gives you an idea of where to take her. For now, meet her somewhere that seems more casual than romantic. Try a coffee shop (if she’s the intellectual type) or a bowling alley (for the sports-minded ladies) to keep things pressure-free.

Remember, a little homework never killed an Alpha Male.

In the Field

Armed with a rough idea of what to talk about, the next step is to employ a simple yet powerful technique to ensure conversational success.

Get her going with a little right-back-at-you language. Allow me to explain:

- Let’s say she tells you about that eye-opening foreign student exchange program she did years ago. So, the takeaway is that she’s into traveling and exploring other cultures.

- You shoot this right back at her by saying the “same” thing: “Hey, that’s pretty cool…I remember spending the summer at my grandfather’s farm for the first time. I was mostly raised in the city, so it was a totally different world – in a good way. It’s awesome being out of your comfort zone and trying something new, you know what I mean?”

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